Grouchy Golf Blog

Matt Jones: Johnny Miller's Man Crush?

2008-03-05T20:42:00.000-08:00

Johnny Miller sounded like a man in love last week at the Honda Classic. However, the object of his affection wasn't some hot young Betty, but a 27 year-old Aussie golfer named Matt Jones. Johnny's frequent gushing over this PGA Tour rookie during the 3rd round reminded me of some pre-teen girls talking about heartthrob Corey Haim back in middle-school.

Just read a giddy Miller commenting on a slo-mo replay of Matt's swing on Saturday: "He has a perfect setup...Just a "10" on a scale of 1 to 10...He has a real good "chase"...I really believe that he has a good chance to be a star in the next couple of years."

Ironically, these comments came shortly after Johnny criticized Ernie Els' swing, arguably the best swing of all-time! I guess Johnny reserves the über praise for golfers that have incorporated his patented "chase" move. It's been a recurring theme with Johnny Miller for quite some time now. I just wish that I knew what the heck he's talkin' about.

And Johnny, don't you think that you're a little premature anointing this guy as the next young golf star? In four years on the Nationwide Tour, he failed to win any of the 94 events that he played. Have the Wies finally convinced you that winning doesn't matter? Remember, people once thought that Corey Haim had star potential. Those people were morons.

Tilghman and Faldo: Corporate Shills?

2008-02-25T19:42:00.000-08:00

During the television coverage of last week's Accenture Match Play Championship, there seemed to be enough promotion to rival a Ron Popeil infomercial. Only it wasn't Ron plugging stuff but the Golf Channel's on-air personalities, Kelly Tilghman and Nick "Han" Faldo. Every time a player hit the new Nike SQ Sumo square driver, Kelly was sure to identify the driver and comment about how much that player loves its performance. During the final match between Tiger and Stewart Cink, Kelly made sure to point out that the "Swoosh" was well represented in the tournament with Nike staffers Woods, Cink and Leonard making it to the semis. Is Kelly trying to make amends with Tiger over the "Lynch him in a back alley" incident or is there some kind of undisclosed relationship between her and Nike? Whatever the reason, it is suspicious at best that she made no similar comments about other golf manufacturers or equipment.

Tilghman's booth-mate was even guiltier of thinly-veiled promotion. Faldo did his best to sneak in plugs for his current endorser, TaylorMade Adidas Golf. Faldo made it a point to talk about players using the new TaylorMade Monza Spider putter with success. But even worse, he took an opportunity to bash his former endorser, Nike, while extolling the performance of TaylorMade's new golf ball. Nick went out of his way to highlight Golf Magazine's recent golf ball test results that showed the new TaylorMade TP ball bested the Nike One Platinum by 20 yards with a driver (90 mph swingspeed). C'mon Nick, was it just a mere coincidence that you happen to choose your current company's ball to compare against that of your old company? I think not. It was quite a cheap shot you old bloke!

Sadly, this isn't the first time that golf announcers have utilized their abundant air time to serve as pitchmen. In the past, I can recall Paul Azinger plugging Nike and Johnny Miller will still occasionally mention Callaway. It's just that this kind of conflict of interest has never been as blatant before as it is now. If an announcer has a relationship with another company, it needs to be disclosed upfront. When I tune into a golf broadcast, I want golf coverage, not an infomercial. It's not like this kind of advertising is effective anyway. How stupid do they think we are?! Now I wonder where I can demo that new Nike driver and buy a box of those hot TaylorMade balls...

Adam Scott: Tiger's Top Challenger?

2008-02-19T21:42:00.000-08:00

Butch Harmon believes that one of his current pupils is best poised to take down his former star student, Tiger Woods. Who would that be, you ask? Phil Mickelson would have been a good guess. However, it's not the Joker, but the White Tiger, Adam Scott. According to ESPN, Harmon said, "He (Scott) is the only one who can challenge Tiger Woods in the next four or five years. He's the only one I see of the young players with all the things it takes to get close to Tiger Woods."

That's a pretty bold statement. IMHO, Scott just doesn't possess the short game or putting skills to put him anywhere close to Tiger. On top of that, he hasn't exhibited that "I'm gonna rip your throat out" killer instinct that is a prerequisite for all great athletes. Tiger simply owns the best mental game in golf and no one will be able to beat him on a consistent basis as long as his body holds up.

However, the current #5 player in the world does many things that rival and may even exceed that of the world's #1. In particular, Adam Scott's full swing is a thing of beauty. In fact, it's almost an exact copy of Tiger's swing, circa 2000. I think it's one of the best golf swings of all-time and I was sorry to see Tiger abandon it due to stress on his left knee. But it's really amazing to see how well Adam has copied Tiger's old swing. A while ago, I posted a video comparing the swings of Adam Scott and Tiger Woods side by side. It is one of my personal favorites and remains one of the most viewed videos on this site. Recently, I've uncovered another swing comparison video for your viewing pleasure:

It is quite apparent that Adam has copied Tiger's swing to the "tee". However, it is Tiger Wood's innate ability, intangibles and insane work ethic that will keep him well ahead of the pack over the foreseeable future. Does anyone really think otherwise?

Has Titleist Jumped the Shark?

2008-01-21T20:42:00.000-08:00

My friends over at the Sand Trap got the latest scoop on Titleist's upcoming 2008 iron lines. It includes four new models, the AP1, AP2, ZB and ZM. My first reaction was, "Oh crap, has Titleist just jumped the shark?"

"What the hell does that mean?" you ask? Well it's an entertainment industry term that refers to the point when a successful show has passed its peak. The phrase refers to a scene in "Happy Days" where Fonzie (Henry Winkler), wearing swim trunks and his trademark leather jacket, jumps over a shark while water skiing. The sheer ridiculousness of that scene sent the popular TV show into a ratings tailspin. Now it has been used as a metaphor for anything that has passed it's peak. I use it often to describe some of my favorite companies when they start to make crappy products.

For example, one of my favorite car companies was BMW. Ever since I could remember, BMW had consistently improved the aesthetic designs of their cars. Amazingly, each generation of their models had improved upon the previous generation in both form and function. That is, until one Christopher Edward Bangle became BMW's Chief of Design in 1992. Soon thereafter, BMW produced cars that were more Rosie O'Donnell rather than Angelina Jolie. My friends over at The Truth About Cars wrote, "Chris Bangle’s designs are still a shock to the system. I still cringe whenever one of the BMW's 'flame surfaced' 7 Series hoves into view. I still shake my head when I catch a glimpse of a 5 Series’ mascara headlights. I still avert my eyes when any of his models drive past, for fear of glimpsing the rightfully reviled 'Bangle butt.'" I couldn't describe my feelings about the "Bangle Mangle" any better. I swear that the people who buy these new bimmers are suffering from a kind of "beer goggle" phenomenon produced by the BMW badge. Take that bavarian logo away, and they'd quickly realize that their beauty was really a beast. Yes, BMW jumped the shark!

Similarly, I believe that the same fate may be in store for my beloved Titleist. IMHO, Titleist is the premier all-around golf company. If I had to equip myself with golf gear from only one company, there's no doubt that I'd choose Titleist. Most serious golfers would do likewise. But that may all change based on the early teaser shots of their new iron lines. Of course it's premature to base anything from a couple of photos, but aesthetics are an important feature of an iron's design. Unfortunately these new Titleist irons just don't do it for me. They are a dramatic design departure that reminds me of BMW's recent history. Well, I guess it doesn't look like my garage will feature a new bimmer or a new set of Titleists anytime soon!

The Silly Season Got Sillier

2007-12-26T15:23:00.000-08:00

I used to really enjoy watching the Skins Game when Turkey day came around once a year. It was exciting to watch the game's best go mano y mano for mucho dinero. But over time, the marquee silly season event changed and so did my interest.

What changed? This year the event moved to a new course, the new Celebrity Course at Indian Wells Golf Resort. But that can only be a positive since the previous course, Trilogy Golf Club at La Quinta, was just not up to snuff. I played that course shortly after it opened in 2002 and it was one of the most disappointing $150+ green fees that I've ever spent. While golf is hard enough, this course just didn't offer much in the way of challenges. The fairways are about as wide as they are long. The small, densely-packed cookie-cutter tract homes that line the fairways ruin the otherwise beautiful natural desert and mountain surroundings. It wouldn't surprise me if the course paid the Skins Game a ton of dough to host the event.

So what changed that turned me off to the Skins Game? Quite simply, it was the players that played in the event. This year the usual $1 million purse was up for grabs for Stephen Ames, Fred Couples, Zach Johnson, and long hitter Brett Wetterich. You gotta be kidding me. I'm a huge golf fan, but you gotta have at least one marquee name to get me to tune in to an off-season golf event. Not only was I uninterested, I was disgusted. What did these guys do to deserve a million bucks playing golf for fun over two days? I bet if they reduced the total purse to $100,000 these same players would have still shown up. It took 25 years but I guess it's official now, the Skins game no longer features the game's best.

The Skins Game debacle just cast a pall over the whole silly season for me. Not only did I not watch a single second of the Skins Game, I didn't watch any silly season event this year. The real season just can't start soon enough!

FedEx Cup Recommendations

2007-10-02T21:42:00.000-07:00

Creating a season-ending playoff system for professional golf is a tremendous challenge. While PGA Tour Commissioner Tim Finchem has been taking a lot of flak lately, he should be commended for attempting such an ambitious venture. While the FedEx Cup has some serious problems, several of the lessons learned can be used to make it better. What's important is that the PGA has taken its first step towards a playoff system.

But if Mr. Finchem asked me for some grouchy advice, I'd be happy to dispense them! Basically, I think that any playoff system for golf needs to conclude with a match play tournament. That way, players are forced to compete in every round/event to win all the marbles. I think that a point system should be retained, but only during the regular season. Points would accumulate for each player during the season, and would determine the qualification and seeding for a post-season match play event. This event would include the top 12 players placed into a 16-slot, 4-round bracket system. The top 4 players would receive automatic byes into the 2nd-round.

However, I've never liked typical match play tournaments where a player must beat an opponent over a single 18-hole match to advance to the next round. It allows too many upsets from inferior players riding a flash-in-the-pan hot streak. Instead, I'd like to see each round played in a best of three match format. In other words, each player must win two out of three matches to advance to the next round. One match would be played per day, so each round would be played over the course of three days, if necessary. This format would be dramatically less draining on players who would otherwise play a full 72 holes in a stroke play event. I envision one round per week and since there are only 4 rounds, it would cover the same amount of time as the current FedEx Cup format.

Imagine the excitement of watching such an event. The winner would be the indisputable golf champion and truly worthy of the FedEx Cup! What do you think?

FedEx Cup Lessons Learned

2007-09-17T22:42:00.000-07:00

Now that the inaugural run of the the PGA Tour's playoff series, currently known as the FedEx Cup, has come to a close, here are some of the things that I've learned:

Tiger really is "The Man" - It seems like after every time Tiger tees off, some yahoo in the gallery yells out, "You the man!" It turns out that this yahoo was right all along. The FedEx Cup showcased the best player in the universe playing some of the best golf of his career. When Tiger hits fairways, he is virtually unbeatable. The FedEx Cup reaffirmed this emphatically.

Tiger Woods' swing has changed for the better - During NBC's coverage, Dan Hicks commented that Butch Harmon believed that Tiger was swinging the club better than his phenomenal ballstriking year in 2000. That's not surprising because it appears that Tiger has returned to some of those Butch Harmon swing elements circa 2000. I'm no swing expert, but my eyes have noticed some changes in Tiger's swing over the last several months. He appears to be standing taller and reverting back to Harmon's bread-and-butter two-plane swing. Tiger originally hired Hank Haney to teach him the one-plane swing with the ultimate goal of relieving career-jeopardizing stress on his left knee and to solve his frequent swing flaw of getting "stuck." While the one-plane may extend the life of his rickety left knee, it does little to prevent him from getting "stuck." I think that Tiger has finally come to this realization and he will commit to the two-plane while incorporating certain teachings from Haney. I think that we are all naturally either one or two-plane swingers and that Tiger is a natural two-planer. No offense to Mr. Haney, but Tiger swings the club best on two-planes.

Phil Mickelson is less of a choker, but he's still the joker - Phil has all the skill and talent to go toe-to-toe with Tiger. However, his mental approach will prevent him from beating Tiger on a consistent basis. Sure, Phil beat Tiger at the Deutsche Bank Championship, proving that he's no longer sitting near the top of ESPN's "Worst Choke Artists" list. However, his constant go-for-broke mentality almost cost him again. He's clearly too stubborn, too arrogant or both to ever relinquish this long-standing behavior. I guess it doesn't bother him because he's always smiling about it.

The FedEx Cup format is far from perfect - I have a graduate degree in finance from a reputable institution, but even that high-priced education was insufficient for me to understand the FedEx Cup's point system. I can only imagine how the everyday golf fan felt about it. The architects of the FedEx Cup need to revisit the drawing board and devise a better system. Not only was it too complex, it allowed the top golfers to ditch some events altogether without causing much of a penalty. Not only did Tiger not participate in the first FedEx Cup event, The Barclays, but in retrospect he could have skipped the last event, The Tour Championship, and still have hoisted the FedEx Cup. That's a pretty ridiculous scenario for a so-called playoff system.

Money talks - Usually this time of the year, the world's best golfers have packed it in for the season to watch football. The FedEx Cup's huge purse enticed them back onto the course for some serious competition. Heck, it wasn't until the FedEx Cup's second event that we got to see some head to head competition between Tiger and Phil this year. With all of it's flaws, the FedEx Cup succeeded in this regard.

The FedEx Cup sure is pretty - One thing that adds legitimacy to the FedEx Cup is its beautiful trophy. Designed and created by Tiffany & Co., it is made of sterling silver and took approximately six months to create. At 15 inches in diameter, it is perfectly sized and shaped to hold all that prize money!

Did you learn anything interesting from the FedEx Cup? Please let me know! Stay tuned as I reveal my recommendations for next year's FedEx Cup in the near future. That means you Mr. Finchem!

Funny Golf Stories

2007-08-20T22:42:00.000-07:00

Jason Sobel over at ESPN asked his readers to email him their best golf stories after he wrote about one of his. In a scant 4 days, he received over 500 reader submissions! Jason highlighted the 10 best here. I found the grouchiest story, i.e. the one that would most likely happen to me, to be the one submitted by Dan S. from Goldens Bridge, N.Y.:

In the early '90s, I was a guest at the Shady Oak Club in Fort Worth, Texas. Founded by Ben Hogan, by this time, the elderly Ben would spend his days in the grill overlooking the 18th hole. I was 12-over-par after 17 that day and was feeling good about my round until my approach at 18 found one of the greenside bunkers. I grabbed my sand wedge and as I readied to hit the shot, I noticed that Mr. Hogan was standing at the window watching me. Shaking like a leaf and with a bad case of the nervous sweats, I proceeded to blade the ball and hit it directly into the bunker on the opposite side of the green. I then repeated the performance and ended up about one foot from my original lie in the first bunker. As I readied my third bunker shot, I looked up towards the grill window and watched as Hogan sadly shook his head and turned away from the window, probably wondering who had let this bumbling cretin on his course. To this day, when I'm asked about the quality of my game, I honestly reply that I have a game that disgusted Ben Hogan.

It's a great story and one that can be appreciated by any golfer. However, I still think the funniest golf story is "The Hottest Driver." I still get a chuckle out of that one!

You're Fired!

2007-08-02T21:42:00.000-07:00

If there was one tournament that I wish that I could have attended this year, it would have been the Canadian Open. It's not because it featured a particularly strong field, nor that it was an exciting competition. The real reason was to witness the drama that unfolded on the 15th hole during the first round involving Jay Williamson and his caddy. You can read the full story on ESPN, or you can just read the Grouchy Cliff Notes:

Golfer flies green
Golfer blames caddy
Caddy tells golfer to shove it
Golfer fires caddy
Caddy dumps golfer's golf balls into the lake
Golfer hires a new looper from the gallery

How cool would it have been to have seen this happen live and in person?! But the real clincher for me is that Jay only paid his temporary caddy a dozen golf balls for four holes of work! Come on Jay, we all know that you get 'em for free. At least tip the guy a couple of Benjis.

Jackass: Golf Edition

2007-07-20T10:15:00.000-07:00

Jackass, the wildly popular TV show and movie series, is one of my guilty pleasures. It's so stupid it's funny. It also evokes memories from my youth because Johnny Knoxville and his crew reminds me of my crazy buddies from high school.

Interestingly, Jackass has inspired a countless number of idiots to videotape their random acts of stupidity. A couple of Jackass wannabes have managed to incorporate golf into a wild stunt:

I don't know who's crazier, the human golf tee or the guy swinging the club. I know that I don't have the cojones to do either.

Is Michelle Wie Lost in the Nile?

2007-07-06T12:04:00.000-07:00

Mark Twain once remarked, "Denial is more than just a river in Egypt." Never has this been more evident than in Michelle Wie's comments during last week's U.S. Women's Open at Pine Needles Lodge & Golf Club. After posting a shockingly hacker-ish 82 after the first-round, Wie explained, "It's just a very fine line between shooting 69 and shooting what I shot today. It's really frustrating because my scores aren't showing the way I'm playing." Say "What?"

Clearly, her over-paid sports psychologist has over-marinated the poor girl with the "stay positive" psycho-babble. Her interview responses are so forced now that it sounds absolutely regoddamndiculous. Any golfer in his right mind will tell you that the line between 13 strokes is pretty friggin' wide. I didn't watch her round at all, but from what I've read, Wie's game is in total disarray. After hitting only four fairways and four greens, how she could have possibly thought that a 69 was in the realm of possibility is beyond me. I have shot a bazillion 82s in my life and never once did I think that any of them had a shot to break 70! Like my old boss used to tell me, "you can put as much lipstick you want on pig, but it's still a pig."

All of this comes shortly after Wie exited Annika Sorenstam's Ginn Tribute under a cloud of mystery thicker than Angel Cabrera's cigarette smoke. To top it off, the little ingrate had the nerve to refuse to offer an apology to "Ms. 59" for checking out early. Like a modern-day Dorian Gray, the image of Wie in the public eye has deteriorated from the once adorable and innocent golf prodigy and into the spoiled and disrespectful golf cretin.

Is it too late to salvage Wie's once promising golf career? Of course not. But things must change drastically for the better. Her current path is a progressive train wreck and will only lead to self-destruction. Michelle needs to grow up and "find" herself far away from her helicopter parents. She needs "Team Me" instead of "Team Wie". What better place for this to happen than in college? She has already stated her intention to attend Stanfurd this fall. There she can concentrate less on the game of golf and more on the game of quarters, century club, and beer pong. Who knows, it turned out great for Long John Daly.

Watch "The Science of Golf"!

2007-06-23T20:23:00.000-07:00

Last month there was a really cool golf TV show produced by the PGA Tour and IBM called "The Science of Golf":

"The Science of Golf will show how the best players on the PGA TOUR utilize cutting edge technology to elevate their game to the highest level," said Gil Kerr, the Tour's SVP of Programming. "We went inside the laboratories of virtually every major golf equipment manufacturer. We sat down with the best swing coaches in the game today—including Butch Harmon, Hank Haney, David Leadbetter, Jim McLean, Jim Flick and Dave Pelz—and we have combined this with the best of the PGA TOUR archives and never before seen super slow motion footage to capture how the best players in the game utilize science and technology on and off the course."

It featured a lot of great slow motion swing and ball impact sequences all in glorious HD! If you missed the original airing, you'll have another chance to watch it:

"Part 1: The Power Game" will be re-broadcast Sun., June 24th from 12:00pm - 1:00pm EST.

"Part 2: The Short Game" will be re-broadcast Sat., July 7th from 2:00pm - 3:00pm EST.

If you're a golf junkie, be sure not to miss it!

Update: "titleistman1" has posted "The Science of Golf, Part 1: The Power Game" in seven parts on YouTube. Below is the first part. Thanks titleistman1!

Driver on a Par-3? Sacrilege!

2007-06-11T22:42:00.000-07:00

Back in April, Tiger Woods played Oakmont Country Club, site of this week's U.S. Open, for the first time. Based on his experience, it sounds like we're in for a doozie! According to the world's #1, "Overall, I'd say it's a lot harder than Augusta National...The greens were running about 10 ½ on the Stimpmeter, and they were plugged last week. I don't think they were designed for that kind of speed, so it should be interesting."

But what I found the most interesting was reading about the par-3 8th hole. From the tips, it plays to 288 yards! It will be the longest par-3 in major championship history. Are we going to be seeing players hit driver on this hole? Most of the field will let the big dog eat, but not Tiger Woods! During his practice round, he hit 3-wood and managed to reach the middle of the green.

"I refuse to hit driver," Woods said, smiling. "It's against my religion."

If that's the case, forgive me Father, for I have sinned! I have hit driver on par-3s several times, but all on one course. Ironically, it is the site of next year's U.S. Open, Torrey Pines South Course. On the back nine, there are two monster par-3s: the 221-yd. 11th and the 227-yd. 16th. While not as daunting yardage-wise compared to Oakmont's 8th, both of the tee shots on these holes face directly towards the ocean. As most of us know, ocean breezes can have a adverse affect on golf balls. The first time that I played Torrey Pines, a storm played with me. The blustery conditions forced me to hit driver on both of these hellish par-3s but it still wasn't enough! The gale force winds spade and neutered my normally 250-ish yd. drives to mere hacker-like 200 yd. drives. I guess it was the Golf Gods' punishment for my sins!

Michelle Wie vs. Ernie Els

2007-06-05T18:23:00.000-07:00

It's almost en vogue these days to hate on teen golf phenom Michelle Wie. It wasn't too long ago that she was the darling of women's golf. She was supposed to be to the LPGA what Tiger has become to the PGA. Alas, a series of odd mishaps and a Kobe Bryant-esque stubborn desire to play with the big boys have dropped her popularity amongst her peers and fans alike.

It's too bad that her life is becoming stranger than fiction. But let's not forget that this girl can flat out play golf. Her golf swing is a thing of beauty. In fact, I would rate her swing among the top ten of all active players, male or female. Clearly, there's not a better better swing on the LPGA. Just check out how her swing sequence compares to arguably the best swing in golf, Ernie Els:

It's remarkable to see the similarities of their swings both in positions and tempo. But as we all know, owning the best swing doesn't amount to jack unless it is coupled with solid putting and a winning attitude. Unfortunately, Michelle has yet to demonstrate either on a consistent basis.

Justin Timberlake, Take Your SexyBack!

2007-05-14T22:23:00.000-07:00

Not that the PGA really ever had sexiness to begin with, but it sounds like Justin Timberlake is intent on bringing it back. A couple of weeks ago, an unnamed source close to the star said, "Justin is a very keen golfer and he's playing to a very high standard now. His aim it to take it into a pro event - just for a tournament or two. He practices every day, has a coach and takes his clubs wherever he goes." The rumor persists here in LA-LA land.

The nerve that this arrogant sumamabitch thinks he has even a minute chance to make it on the PGA. Somehow being a Musketeer, fronting a boy-band, bedding a few Hollywood's A-listers (including the Club Chucking Cameron), and winning a couple of Grammys has convinced Timberlake that he can do anything. Currently a self-proclaimed 6-handicapper, he is clearly suffering from prolonged delusions of grandeur.

I, for one, hope that this megalomaniac tries to make it to the PGA. I will laugh with glee for days when Q-School (if by some miracle he makes it that far) thoroughly humiliates him back down to earth. His ego-adjusted handicap of 12 is about even with my true handicap. When I tried to play one of Q-School's courses, the Stadium Course at PGA West, it whipped me silly. I happened to play the best golf of my entire life on that course, and yet I still could only muster up an 89 from the middle tees! If I had to play that course from the tips with a tournament setup, I doubt that I could break 100 with my A+ game. That's what's in store for the Mr. *NSYNC. If he is cocky enough to pursue the PGA, it will be far more embarrassing than Michael Jordan's attempt to make it to Major League Baseball.

Just the notion that he thinks that he can hang with the pros supports his position atop US Weekly's biggest ego list. According to the entertainment magazine, "(Timberlake) has claimed that McDonald's shares climbed 25 per cent when he walked into their offices and changed their image." I'm sure that the Golf Gods can't wait to strike down this überposeur and start singing, "Bye bye bye!"

It Must be Great to be the Skipper

2007-05-02T00:04:00.000-07:00

Pro-Ams are a cool way for hackers to tee it up with the best golfers in the world. Being able to play with the pros is one reason why golf is so special. While pro-ams can be a bore to watch, it must be a tremendous thrill for those amateurs lucky enough to participate.

I would die to play in a PGA pro-am. Having the opportunity to compare my game directly to a real PGA tour pro would be just mind-blowing. The amount that I would learn from such an experience would be priceless. Just having a gallery to keep my ball in play would be great!

From what I’ve read, most pro-ams have a "pairings party" with a drawing to determine the pros that the amateurs get to spend 5+ hours of quality time together. So, if you are especially fortunate enough to play in a pro-am that Tiger Woods is also playing, there's a possibility of playing a round with him! To anyone who considers himself a golfer, scoring a tee time with Tiger is like winning the lottery.

In that case, Skipper Beck must feel like he just won the Powerball. You see, not only is Skipper playing with Tiger in today's Wachovia Pro-Am, but the third person of their threesome is Michael "Air" Jordan! Yeah, you read that right: the Michael Jordan of golf and the Tiger Woods of basketball. Can you imagine spending most of your day playing golf with arguably the two greatest athletes of our generation? To say that this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity is an understatement.

Just who is this Skipper Beck? From what I can gather, he's a high-roller who inherited a Benzo dealership, married a blond bombshell, and hobnobs with Charlotte's upper crust. In short, this guy's life doesn't suck. The fact that he is playing in every sports fan's dream threesome on top of all this makes me wonder whether he sold his soul to the devil. One thing is clear: just like it was in the Sixties, it's much better to be the Skipper than Gilligan.

Butch Harmon is Phil Mickelson's Coach. Oh, Sweet Revenge!

2007-04-22T11:42:00.000-07:00

"Oldboy," a movie directed by Chan-wook Park, is one of my favorite movies of all-time. The second movie of a revenge-themed trilogy, "Oldboy" is a brilliant tale of the tragic consequences from revenge breeding upon itself. In other words, revenge begets revenge which begets even more revenge, so on and so forth.

If Mr. Park decides to make another revenge flick, he can simply base it on the recent pairing of Butch Harmon with Phil Mickelson. According to the Kojak of Golf, Tim Rosaforte, "...sources have told Golf World the Mickelson-Harmon alliance will be made official before the EDS Byron Nelson Championship in Irving, Texas." While the coaching change is meant to fix Mickelson's wayward driver, it also satisfies the thirst for revenge.

Here is a short summary of the vengeance undertones found in golf's newest coaching relationship:

Butch is seeking revenge against Tiger Woods for leaving him in favor of Hank Haney
Mickelson is seeking revenge against Tiger Woods for the countless times that he has finished behind the world's #1
Butch is seeking revenge against Rick Smith for giving swing advice to Tiger Woods at the 1996 U.S. Open when Harmon was still Tiger's coach

But the story may not stop here. Of all the coaches that Mickelson could have chosen, he couldn't have picked one that would have irked Rick Smith more than Butch Harmon. They like each other about as much as Kobe and Shaq. Interestingly, Rick Smith could exact revenge against both his former pupil and his coaching arch-nemesis by teaming up with Tiger. Such a scenario would also enable Tiger to exact revenge on his former coach and his top rival. It sounds almost too good to be true, but with rumors circulating that Tiger may now be unhappy with his swing under Haney's tutelage, don't count it out!

It will be interesting to see how all of this plays out. But one thing is clear, the proverb "revenge is a dish best served cold" still holds true.

Tiger Woods Juggling Act, Part Deux?

2007-04-17T12:04:00.000-07:00

Remember that cool Nike golf commercial where Tiger is bouncing a Platinum One up and down with his wedge without any of that special effects mumbo jumbo?

Well, EA Sports has an interesting take on that concept with Nintendo's virtual reality machine called the Wii. Check out the video:

It's clever, but I enjoy watching Tiger playing himself on the Wii a little bit more. Kudos to EA Sports!

The Tiger-Proofed Masters

2007-04-09T23:42:00.000-07:00

This seems to be the consensus opinion on the 2007 Masters:

“Tiger-proofing” has made Augusta National too difficult
As a result, birdies and eagles were rare, taking the excitement out of the event
Bottom Line: It was a borefest

I must be in the minority, but I thoroughly enjoyed the 71st Masters. Maybe the setup was too difficult for a traditional Masters, but when it comes to tournament golf, I prefer attrition warfare over shootouts. Don’t get me wrong, I do believe that a course can be too difficult. The 2004 U.S. Open at Shinnecock was a prime example of the silliness that can arise from a sadist greenskeeper gone wild. But as long as a golf course is fair, I think that it’s fine. After all, everyone plays on the same course.

The difficult conditions left a wide-open Masters for the final round. On Sunday, Stuart Appleby, Rory Sabbatini, Retief Goosen, Zach Johnson and Tiger Woods all owned a piece of the lead at some point. Call me crazy, but I find such a “neck and neck” competition much more interesting than someone trouncing the field by 5 strokes the entire day.

Unfortunately, there was one key ingredient missing from this year’s Masters that would have made it magical: a classic Tiger charge. We all expected it, but it never came. Uncharacteristically, Tiger lost a final-round lead! However, don’t blame the course for that, Tiger clearly didn’t have his A, B or even C game. But take nothing away from Zach Johnson. He did not fold under the pressure and instead played brilliant golf. Unlike many winners this year, Zach won this tournament.

But imagine if Tiger was his usual self and forced Zach Johnson into a playoff ala Bob May in the PGA Championship circa 2000. Wouldn’t that have been exciting? All of a sudden, this Masters goes down in the history books as one of the best ever. Oh well, I guess Tiger is indeed human. It's either that or the Masters has truly been "Tiger-Proofed." Regardless, I'm just glad that I watched it all unfold on CBS in 100% high def, unlike that NBC "HD-lite" treatment.

A Golden Tee for Distance?

2007-04-01T16:08:00.000-07:00

I recently had the opportunity to chat with Jack Mehoffer, VP of marketing at Hanso Golf, regarding their latest product introduction. It's called "Golden Tees", and they represent the latest in golf tee technology.

Golf Grouch: What are they?

Jack Mehoffer: In short, Golden Tees provide the lowest Static Coefficient of Friction between a golf ball and a tee. In layman's terms, these tees are scientifically proven to provide the least resistance between the golf ball and tee. As a result, the ball will travel farther.

What does this mean for golfers?

Research conducted by our Head of R&D, Rod Stiffington, indicates that Golden Tees can increase driving distance 10% or more. So a golfer with an average driving distance of 250 yards can expect a 25 yard increase by simply switching to the Golden Tee.

How do they work?

The wooden golf tee has been used universally since its commercial introduction in the 1920s. Unfortunately, the coefficient of friction from wood is very high, especially against the new urethane-covered golf balls. Metals offer much lower coefficients of friction, but you can't make 100% metal golf tees because they damage clubs and lawn mower blades. Golden Tees offer the benefit of metal contact with the golf ball, but without the drawbacks of 100% metal golf tees. In addition, we are utilizing the metal with the lowest coefficient of friction against urethane, gold."

Are you using real gold?

Yes, we only utilize 24K gold. We try to minimize the cost by only coating the contact areas with gold. In addition, we've developed a patent-pending electroplating technology to apply a layer of gold onto the contact area about 100 microns thick. That's about the thickness of a human hair.

What is the availability and retail price?

Golden Tees can be found soon at specialty golf retailers for $10 a tee or a package of 50 for $450. We think that this is a small price to pay for a 10% increase in driving distance.

Who's using them?

The best players in the world will be teeing up with Golden Tees at this week's Masters. Look for them on TV! Interestingly, Golden Tees are also becoming a favorite among major Hip Hop artists such as Snoop Dogg, Kanye West and P. Diddy. Apparently, they love the "bling".

What's next?

Well, we're constantly looking for ways to minimize the friction between the golf ball and tee. We have already developed prototypes of tees utilizing the material with the lowest coefficient of friction. Care to guess what that might be?

I have no idea.

It's ice. We are tentatively calling the product "Iced Tee". They are currently undergoing hot weather testing in the Mojave desert. Unfortunately, it appears that there are still some snags that we must overcome before we bring it to market.

NBC HD and NBCee It Is Not Must See TV

2007-03-23T18:23:00.000-07:00

I was ecstatic to learn earlier this year that CBS is broadcasting all of its golf coverage now in glorious high-definition (HD). It looks spectacular on my 6 month-old 1080p Sharp HDTV. Well it turns out that the only other national golf television broadcaster, NBC, is broadcasting in HD too! Naturally, I expected NBC's HD coverage to rival that of its competitor, especially after they were able to see several CBS golf broadcasts. Sadly, it appears that the once innovative peacock has lost some of its tail feathers.

Anyone who owns a high-def TV can appreciate the enhanced resolution that HD content presents over standard definition (SD). Some say once you go HD you never go back. The clarity can be amazing, but only if the content is originally shot in HD. In fact, due to rescaling and resizing, normal old SD content looks especially bad on an HDTV.

I've watched virtually every NBC golf broadcast this season, and it's obvious that they are only employing HD cameras in about half of their coverage. It appears that they use HD cameras in their towers and SD cameras on the course. One minute the picture appears as if you were there at the tournament observing through a glass window, and the next it looks like your viewing through a screen door.

Don't get me wrong, I'm thankful that NBC is improving their golf coverage quality. However, I'm a bit irked that they are billing their presentation as HD when it is clearly only partially HD. Compared to CBS' full HD offering, NBC's "HD-lite" comes up woefully short.

But it also seems that NBC is losing ground on the innovation front. We all love CBS' Emmy award-winning SwingVision to analyze golf swings. Earlier this year, NBC introduced "NBCee It" to combat SwingVision. In short, it simply enlarges any small part of the picture, like a magnifying glass over a photo. Unfortunately, the resolution of the magnified area is painfully low. It resembles the Atari 2600 game "Breakout". Disaster isn't the word. Not only does it look horrible, but it does little to enhance the swing analysis.

Then there's NBC's golf announcement team. What can I say? If not the most elegant speaker, Johnny Miller does know golf. But there's just not much exciting going on with his supporting cast. They're kind of like parsley on a dinner plate, they neither enhance nor detract from the main course. They definitely don't inject any amount of wit and humor like that of the CBS golf crew. You would have thought that NBC would have landed an interesting personality in the aftermath of the ABC golf breakup. Instead it was CBS who bolstered an already excellent crew.

Like most things, it probably boils down to money. It's clear that NBC is spending much less on it's golf coverage than CBS; much less on technology, equipment, and talent. If NBC wants to compete with CBS, they need to step up and show me the money! If they do, then maybe I'll watch more NBC shows than just "The Office" and "Heroes".

I am Tiger Woods (on the Wii)

2007-03-10T10:23:00.000-08:00

Technology moves at a quick pace. Video games has been a major beneficiary with the introduction this year of the "next-gen" gaming consoles the Nintendo Wii and the Sony PS3 to do battle with Microsoft's Xbox 360. Probably the coolest innovation is the Wii's motion-controlled controller, the Wii Remote. Instead of simply moving a joystick and mashing buttons, you control the action by motioning the controller itself.

This technology greatly expands the possibilities for video gaming. Take golf games, for example. Now it's possible to play a golf video game by actually "swinging" the controller. Can you say, "a golf simulator in your living room for around $300?

Check out this video of EA Sports' Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2007 in action on the Wii in the hands of the great Tiger Woods himself. It's well worth a couple of viewings:

If anyone has played this game, please let us know your thoughts.

SwingVision - Justin Leonard Driver

2007-03-06T08:42:00.000-08:00

For all of you SwingVision junkies out there, I dug up this SwingVision of Justin Leonard hitting his TaylorMade R7 TP driver off the tee. I believe it comes from the 86th PGA Championship at Whistling Straits in 2004 where the sadomasochist of golf, Pete Dye, exacted his revenge on the best golfers in the world. I'm sure that you can recall how ridiculously difficult the course played over those couple of days. Just getting your ball to remain on the green was a great accomplishment. It's a great example of how it is possible to set up a golf course so hard that it's unfair.

Anyway, below is the video. Justin Leonard has a very identifiable golf swing and it is characterized by his Johnny Miller-coined "chase" move through the ball. The video also highlights how contact with the ball should be high on the face of modern drivers to maximize launch conditions (high launch, low spin). Enjoy!

Real Tiger Woods Putter on eBay?

2007-02-22T19:15:00.000-08:00

A little over a year ago, I visited a local golf store and came across an authentic backup to Tiger Woods' Scotty Cameron putter. I really wanted this putter, but I wasn't ready to give my life's savings for it!

As with any high-priced items, there are scumbags out there that make cheap knock-offs to scam unsuspecting consumers. One such scoundrel had the nerve to link his fake Tiger Woods' putter eBay listing to this site as some sort of mark of legitimacy! I tried to foil his plot by telling people who visited that link to have any rare Cameron authenticated prior to purchase. Unfortunately, some poor bastard still shelled out over $300 for this POS. Oh well, buyer beware.

Recently a reader emailed me about another eBay auction for a Tiger Woods' Scotty Cameron putter. With such auctions, it is better to assume guilty (fake) until proven innocent rather than vice versa. But upon closer inspection, it appears that this auction may indeed be legit. First, there is a photo of the putter in front of a Certificate of Authenticity. Second, I ran the registry number from the certificate at the Scotty Cameron Registry and it shows up as registered. The only thing that looks suspicious is the "Letter of Authenticity" signed by Scotty Cameron. You would expect such a letter to be written on more official looking company letterhead and written in the first-person. However, the signature looks like Scotty's.

I decided to do a little more research. I emailed the Scotty Cameron Shop and they replied, "If the putter has a COA then its authentic. As for being made for Tiger that is not stated on the COA nor the number made. Thanks." I checked the forums at the Cameron Collector and found a thread dedicated to this auction. The experts there seemed to think that the auction was legit.

Regardless, bidders of this auction clearly think that it's legit. There's still 4 days remaining in this auction and the bid price has already exceeded $30K. That's a lot of moolah for a single golf club. For the winning bidder's sake, I hope that the putter is real...

Playing with the Pros

2007-02-11T22:04:00.000-08:00

Golf is one of those rare sports where amateurs can play exactly where the pros play. Want to play baseball at Dodger Stadium or touch football at Lambeau Field? Sorry, it ain't happening, ever. But in golf, playing where the pros play is rather easy. Torrey Pines, Riviera and the PGA West Stadium Course are just a few of the PGA tournament courses that I have played. Sometimes it is even possible to play some of the ultra-exclusive PGA stops.

My friend from high school used to work for the Golf Channel. Every year, they flew him out to Augusta, GA to cover the Masters. He told me that the tournament holds a special drawing for the media covering the Masters every year. What are they drawing, you ask? Get this, it's for tee times at Augusta National the day after the final round of the Masters! Unbelievably, my friend won the drawing one year and played Augusta National. Can you imagine that? He got to play Augusta National in the best condition of the year with the Masters setup and final round pin positions. Lucky bastard.

In golf, not only can you play the same courses that the pros play, you can also play with the pros. Every pro tournament features practice rounds where amateurs can tee it up with the pros. However, in some events, amateurs can play with the pros during the actual tournament.

That's the name of the game as the traveling golf circus made it's way to Pebble Beach last week directly from the FBR Open's "Bird's Nest". The AT&T Pebble Beach National Pro-Am is a tournament where the rich and famous get to team up with the pros. Are there any other sports that allows this? Imagine if Phil Jackson put Bill Murray into a game to defend LeBron James. Or how about Kenny G getting decleated by Brian Urlacher after running a slant across the middle. Yes, it's bizarre and it only happens in golf.

It's cool that amateurs can play with the pros, but count me among those who doesn't care to watch it. It's interesting at first, but it gets old fast. Watching narcissistic, spotlight obsessed celebrities trying to ham it up for the camera is just mind numbing. The worst offender this year was D-list, celeb wannabe Vegas entertainer Danny Gans. It's obvious why this dude hasn't "made it" in Hollywood. If I want to watch stand-up I'll tune in to Comedy Central, not a golf broadcast.